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Soul Enchilada 22: March Madness
28:22

Soul Enchilada 22: March Madness

Ah Spring…. time to get going after a winter’s slumber. It’s getting warmer and staying lighter longer, so open the doors, start cleaning, planning, and doing. Summer’s coming! With all those added pressures, is it any wonder that mental health issues like depression, anxiety, and even suicides spike in the Spring? This week, we talk about slowing down. Giving yourself permission to put your priorities in place and establish rhythms that restore sanity in your life. Just because you’ve already lost your basketball pool doesn’t mean you have to lose your mind. This Week’s Listener Question: I’m struggling with insomnia. I wake up every night between 2:00 – 3:00 a.m. and can’t get back to sleep. My anxiety is rising and I’m worried all the time. Spring is coming and I should be happy but I feel crazy. What’s wrong with me? Small Group Questions: 1. Are you experiencing any of the challenges Christine and Laura discussed that are common at this time of year? Are you feeling “March Madness”? 2. List all the pressures that we face as we head into the Spring. 3. How can you gain clarity with your calendar during this time of year? What are your top three priorities in this season? 4. Describe your ideal way to launch and land your days. What’s the first step you can take to start implementing these ways? 5. What might it look like to “put yourself to bed” at night? What obstacles will you need to overcome to start these practices? Bonus Activity: • Read this article Christine brought to our attention about “March Madness” – https://www.mghclaycenter.org/parenting-concerns/teenagers/spring-suicide-an-unlikely-combination/ • What are your questions after reading the article? Please submit them to us at – www.soulenchilada.com Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this. Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/ Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app
Soul Enchilada 21: No Good Options
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Soul Enchilada 21: No Good Options

This Week’s Listener Question: My life is a massive mess (truly a "shitshow") right now. I'm dealing with intense family conflict which makes me feel like I have to pick sides. When I do, one family member will have to move out. At the same time, my work is also exhausting and thankless. I never have time for myself or anywhere I can go to "reboot.” I feel like I'm surrounded with overwhelming demands and drowning every day. Where would you start, if you were me? What do you do when it seems like everything is going wrong all at once? You’re twisting yourself into a pretzel to make everyone happy, but despite your best efforts, NOBODY is, especially you. This week, we talk about how to approach choices when there are simply no good options. Spoiler alert: it starts by taking care of yourself. Small Group Questions: 1. What strategies did you learn or develop as a child for winning love and approval? (People pleasing strategies? Rescuing strategies? Performance and perfectionism strategies?) 2. Do you struggle or feel guilty when you engage in self-care? Why or why not? 3. When it comes to self-care, what do you need these days? 4. Name a problem you’ve been struggling with? What can you control? What can’t you control? How might you hand some of the “work” back to others? Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this. Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/ Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app
Soul Enchilada 20: Kicked Out Of Bible Study
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Soul Enchilada 20: Kicked Out Of Bible Study

This Week’s Listener Question: I have listened to the Soul Enchilada episodes on forgiveness which address forgiving an individual. But how do I forgive the church, not an individual, but rather a very large group of people? We hear you. We’ve each been kicked out of Bible Study before… People have high expectations of “The Church” as an institution and of the people who inhabit it, whether they work there or just go there. Which makes it harder to handle and forgive when they fall short and we’ve been shamed and/or judged for simply being open and honest. But churches are really just collections of messy broken people, most of whom are doing the best they can with what they know. Understanding that is the first step towards forgiving them. But it’s more complicated than that, so listen in as we walk through some steps to take to mend broken relationships with the Church, and it’s people. Small Group Questions: 1. When have you been wounded by a faith community or large group of people? 2. Why do you think we hold faith communities to a higher standard than other groups of people? 3. How is God vastly different from faith communities? 4. How have you been able to reconcile with your imperfect faith community? 5. Have you ever been a part of a safe community? What words would you use to describe it? 6. Where are you called to create “space spaces” in your community? Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this. Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/ Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app
Soul Enchilada 19: Stuck in the Middle
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Soul Enchilada 19: Stuck in the Middle

A “mid-life crisis” isn’t just for balding men in speedos buying sports cars. It can happen to anyone, at any age. Because it’s not about age, it’s about STAGE. We go through major life shifts every 7 years or so. But the transitions aren’t always smooth. It’s in those “spaces in between” stages where we face a choice: stay stuck out of fear, or embrace the ambiguity of change as an adventure. It is possible to move forward, you just need to embrace your inner badass And be sure to check out Christine’s God, Girlfriends and Guinness retreat: https://www.soulenchilada.com/irelandretreat or https://www.irelandretreats.com/ THIS WEEK’S LISTENER QUESTION I’m a new empty nester. I’ve spent the last twenty plus years revolving around my kid’s schedules. Now they’ve launched but I’m depressed and stuck. How do I find myself again? SMALL GROUP QUESTIONS: 1. When have you found yourself in a transition of life? How do you normally feel during transitions? 2. Think of a transition in life. What were you saying good-bye to? What were you saying hello to? 3. What thoughts and emotions come up for you when you’re stuck in between two chapters in life? 4. What mental &/or spiritual practices help you get in touch with your true passions and purpose during this season of life? 5. How can you intentionally carve out more time in your schedule for these practices? Activity: 1. Draw a long timeline. 2. Mark along the time key chapters of life’s important events. 3. Notice any patterns in between the chapters and record your findings. 4. Dream of what the next chapter of your life could look like. 5. Write your hopes, dreams, and/ or prayers for your next chapter on the timeline. Be brave and share your timeline with someone you trust. Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this. Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/ Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app
Episode 18: Let's Talk About SEX, baby....
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Episode 18: Let's Talk About SEX, baby....

“Nice girls don’t talk about sex. Because if they do, it might happen…” Right??? Um… no. Sexual desire, our “erotic part” is a significant, wonderful, and NORMAL part of us. Ignore it at your peril. Because when we keep it in the shadows, it will eventually jump out and hijack us. This week, we talk about sex. And we give you questions to ask yourself and your partner to help you get what you need. Because when you get what you wish for…  SMALL GROUP QUESTIONS: 1. How was sex communicated to you when you were young? 2. How has shame played a role, or shaped, the way you view sex today? 3. Is it clear to you that there’s a difference between guilt and shame? Guilt says, “I did something bad and can learn from this.” Shame says, “I am bad and not worthy of love and connection.” Which one are you most familiar with? If you want to take a DEEP DIVE with your partner, here are some more questions. 4. What holds you back from sharing your true sexual desires or longings with me? 5. When have you felt the deepest connection with me during sex? 6. What sexual experiences are you most curious about? Which ones would you like to imagine / experience with me? RESOURCES: Sex God: Exploring the Endless Connections Between Sexuality and Spirituality by Rob Bell https://www.amazon.com/Sex-God-Exploring-Connections-Spirituality/dp/0062197231/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1ZLM825YDHMID&keywords=SEX+God+rob+bell&qid=1677594832&sprefix=sex+god+rob+bell%2Caps%2C152&sr=8-1 Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life By Emily Nagoski, ph.d https://www.amazon.com/Come-You-Are-Surprising-Transform/dp/B08CPVQT5M/ref=sr_1_1?crid=21BN40F26XZWH&keywords=come+as+you+are+by+emily+nagoski%2C+ph.d&qid=1677595017&sprefix=Come+a%2Caps%2C140&sr=8-1 Esther Perel – TED Talk¬ The Secret to Desire in a Long Term Relationship https://www.ted.com/talks/esther_perel_the_secret_to_desire_in_a_long_term_relationship Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this. Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/ Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app
Soul Enchilada 17: What's the Point?....
27:15

Soul Enchilada 17: What's the Point?....

When it comes to sex, do you ask “What’s the point?” Well good! Because you should. Sex is complicated. On one hand it’s a fantastic bonding agent, a chemical cocktail of pleasure. On the other hand, it can sometimes feel like an obligation weighed down by the baggage of body image and past experiences. This week, let’s work on our erotic intelligence, and maybe even schedule a horizontal meeting with your partner… BECAUSE YOU ARE WORTH IT! THIS WEEK’S LISTENER QUESTION: My husband wants to have sex a lot more often than I do. I hate feeling pressured to have sex. Can you help me/us? SMALL GROUP QUESTIONS: 1. When you think of your body… what ingredients are in your “whole enchilada”? 2. What obstacles have you experienced that stand in your way from experiencing sex with your spouse? Body image? Parenting? Shame?... 3. Why do you think sex is an important part of marriage? 4. What has enabled you to make good connections with your partner… experiencing a wonderful “chemical cocktail”? 5. How do you best connect to your erotic-self? Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this. Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/ Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app
Soul Enchilada 16: The Thrill is Gone
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Soul Enchilada 16: The Thrill is Gone

Since opposites attract, it’s understandable that over time it’s possible, even easy, to drift apart to the point where you feel like you’re just roommates. Relationships can be a little like plants: you’ve got to water them a lot to keep them alive. And that takes work. What do you do when it seems like your partner just isn’t willing to put in the effort? This week we talk about three types of LOVE: Agape (unconditional), Phileos (friendship), and Eros (sex). Specifically, how to put them together as a “three legged stool” on which to balance a healthy relationship. We’ve got tips, we’ve got tricks… so listen in, let us know what you think, and send us some of yours. THIS WEEK’S LISTENER QUESTION: Give me your thoughts on a bad marriage. I think my husband is a narcissist. Basically, we’re just roommates – for the past 3 years we’ve slept in separate bedrooms and our marriage just feels dead. Help! SMALL GROUP QUESTIONS: 1. How has individualism, entitlement, &/or narcissism had an impact in your marriage / relationship? 2. Thinking about your marriage / relationship as a three-legged stool, commitment, friendship, and romance, which is the strongest? Which is the weakest? 3. On a scale from 1 – 10 (1 being almost non-existent, 10 been perfection) how would you rank your marriage / relationship in these three categories… Agape = commitment, sacrificial, selfless love Philia / friendship, affection, trusting love Eros / romance, passionate, sexual love 4. How could you nurture your relationship in each of the three categories? 5. What’s your first step? Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this. Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/ Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app